The force is strong with Disney, and I don’t like it. Yes, I’m about to play Mr. Bad Guy, so strap on your boots. The other night while at Hell Mart(otherwise known as Wal-Mart), the wife comments that she wished something would come along and do away with all of the Frozen items. Yogurt, toys, clothes, bubble gum, nail polish, Christmas cards. You get the idea. Frozen has, in a sense, knocked Duck Dynasty from its high horse and replaced the show’s merchandise. For better or worse, I’ll not offer an opinion on that.
Sadly, Frozen isn’t likely to be knocked from its high horse until the new Star Wars movie releases. I use the term sadly, as we are guaranteed to be blitzed with so much Star Wars merchandise that the sight of it will likely make a vast majority hate the franchise. You will always have the loyal Star Wars fans, yes, but at some point you’re not the coolest guy on the block anymore. Especially when three year old kids are collecting the same hot items you are. Right?
I’ve been vocal about the fact that Star Wars is seriously overrated. Battlestar Galactica, Firefly, Doctor Who, Stargate and Jeremiah. All shows with much better writing and very serious staying power, in my opinion. And that required no thought as the names just popped up – meaning there are likely plenty more. But Star Wars has the financial backing of the good old mouse. Like it or not, Star Wars isn’t going anywhere. It’s likely not to include Jar Jar Binks, but does it really matter? The fans of the original three are now the smaller target group and when it comes to making money, Disney is all over it. The movie, its merchandise and overall experience will be tailored to a younger demographic. That’s just how it is. Translation? Plenty of CGI and characters with little to no depth. The same things hardcore fans bitched about with the second trilogy.
So prepare your closets and clear those toy bins. The overpowering shower of child-targeted merchandise is coming soon. Most science fiction fans will be there opening night, helping to fuel the fires of Disney. I will not be. It takes more than the original theme song and a glimpse of Han’s nifty ship to get me in the mood. The eve of children wearing Star Wars pajamas in droves is upon us. Candy, potato chips, soda cans and so many more items targeted to the young demographic are coming. They have been here since day one, but with Disney at the controls – you haven’t seen anything yet.
You’ve been warned young Jedi. And I do mean young. Unless, of course, you’re one of the older guys holding on to the thread-like dream of recapturing the glory days. If that’s the case, I have two words for you.